To Err is Human, To Sleep Divine

I was recently in a Chicago hotel room, unable to sleep, staring into the darkness that is 4am. Random thoughts ran through my mind like so many apps on an iPhone. You'd think many glasses of wine, a Bailey's, and 2 Rx sleeping pills would be antithetical to a long night of introspection. Au contraire mon fraire. That's when I do some of my best thinking. I just wish I could remember more of it the next day.
This night in question was particularly fruitful, however, because I was catching a plane that morning. I didn't wake up to the routine at home which doesn't often allow much room for thoughts from the night to carry over into the light of day. But on this Chicago morn', I grabbed the little notepad from the hotel room and while waiting in the airport, made notes on several topics that had filled my sleep void. I look forward to blogging about them in the days ahead.
The brain surgery caused my chronic insomnia. The good news is: my ability to sleep is much better than it used to be. The bad news: I have fewer episodes of insomniatic clarity.

The Naked Journal

Soon it will be 2 yrs since I began this process. Why haven't I posted more? As a sporadic journalist, I expected to be more consistent given the benefits of an electronic journal. I constantly edit and rewrite my thoughts; a messy process with pen and paper. The fingers on my right hand don't cramp up on a keyboard. I have an opinion on practically everything and have experienced countless events that I want to document. So is it just a matter of making the time? For me, it's more like justifying the time. But, there is a much larger stumbling block I've had to confront. The reality is, a journal can be tucked away until you are tucked away. You don't have to be present for the unveiling of all your thoughts and fears, opinions and slanders. I realized I quit blogging when the words I wanted to put in writing were not ones I wanted to share in the present. So I begin, again. But with spirits dampened by the realization that I'm not ready to strip naked for all to read.